Day 191- O Christmas Tree!!

So on Sunday Eric and I celebrated 6 months of marriage. YAY for us!! We also celebrated the fact that we are not buying a house....well not right now anyways. How did we celebrate you ask.....by shopping!! Wont tell you how much we spent....it was alot.....but it was worth it especially cause we hardly ever do it. It was fun.

We got our Christmas tree up about 2 weeks ago and finally completed it this week.

Eric and I never living on our own left us starting from scratch when it comes to Christmas decor. I did pick up a few things last year after the holidays last year when it went on sale and a soon as they started putting out stuff this year I started buying ornaments. We only have enough to fill the front of the tree but who sees the back anyways!! It looked slightly incomplete with just the ornaments so I added the ribbon and the other do-dads at the top a few days later. I think it looks great! Below are a few of our favorites.

Here is some of the decorations we picked up....it isnt much but its enough to make it look like Christmas!

These are the Christmas dishes that we have had for like two years. I almost forgot them till Eric found them while looking for something else. I wanted some green place mats but haven't been able to find any I like yet.

Well there it is! Hope everyone is having a good holiday season. I know sometimes this time of year can be hard on some. The darkness and the cold sets in and sometimes it can make some people depressed. Not to mention this time of year also reminds us of those who cant be here with us or those that we have lost. If you have lost someone this year or miss someone who has been gone for a while I pray that you will find the good in this season instead of the bad. Also remember that Jesus is the reason for the season. Presents are nice but thats what we have made of it. I wonder sometimes if that was God's intent for Christmas. Did he really mean for us to go out, spend a lot of money, in hopes that our money will be returned to us in gifts?? I don't know.

I sadly report that as your week ends mine begins. I have about a week left of orientation....yes I am still on orientation. The closer and closer it comes, the more and more I get nervous and stressed. I think that I am ready, and I know that I wont technically be "alone" but it all being in my hands is a little unnerving for me. They tell me it takes 2 years to be comfortable in my skin....two years feel like a life time. I am confident and I know I can ask if I am unsure...but to be honest I hate telling people "I don't know." The nurse is always suppose to know in the patients eyes. You know whats sad. I watch a baby story, and 16 and pregnant, and whatever else is on TV involving L&D so that even when I am not at work, I am still learning. And yes I learn from 16 and pregnant. I learn mostly how to deal with that age client. Its kinda crazy. But I want to be the best at what I do.....not right now....but one day. But I work with a pretty awesome group of women who have been doing this for years and have gotten me to the point I am at today. I strive to be like them one day.

I wish I had more to say....but for now thats about it. I think I am going to go eat something and watch a movie....

Day 179

Hope every one have a fabulous Thanksgiving. Ours, in everyone else's opinion, was probably boring, but after three tough nights at work it was just what I needed. Working the night and not having children really gives me the best of both worlds.....I get to do what I love and sleeping in is a regular activity.....its pretty much awesome. For example I slept in till 11 today...but I honestly didn't get out of bed till around 1....it drives Eric NUTS!!

So I had to work the night before Thanksgiving, and it was a rough one and my third in a row.....how these people work 6 12hr shifts in a row blows my mind because I am tired after 2 and exhausted after 3 in a row. So anyways.... I was planning on making an apple pie for our family Thanksgiving.....like all the way homemade....crust and cutting apples and everything.....yeah that didn't happen....there wasn't a chance in Haties that was going to happen! I did manage to make green bean casserole.....which I had never made or eaten....blame my mother. But by time we made it to the actual dinner everyone had eaten....So I ended up bring most of it home. Then we went to the movies and saw Tangled. Call us children, but we love stuff like that. It was cute. Even Eric liked it.

Today we did NOTHING!!! and it was pretty much awesome! My family has never really been into the whole black friday shopping thing. I have no desire to stand outside, in the rain, stand in line for 4 hrs, fight people to the death, park a mile away, to save $5 on some electronic, or a sweater.....or anything else for that matter. I am the cyber Monday kind of girl. I would much rather chop online....plus some times the deals are better then they are in the store and some places offer free shipping, which is always a plus. We may venture out tomorrow though. We did get out some of our Christmas dishes, which have been stowed in a box for 2 years waiting for us to get our own place. We are contemplating a Christmas tree this weekend, but I still haven't decided yet. The cat and the tree dont mix well and I dont know if I want to out up with that for a month...we will see.

We have a lot to be thankful for this year. Pretty much everything we have wanted to happen has. Graduating form college, getting married, getting my dream job, passing boards and getting a license, not to mention Eric's business doing well, having a great vaca at disney, our families, our health, our church, our troops for fighting for our country and being away from their families so that we get to be with ours, and everything else that we dont deserve. Most of all I am thankful for our Savior for saving us. We are blessed beyond measure and I know that we forget about that most of the time. We have way more then we need, and alot that we dont deserve. I hope that every took the time yesterday to thank God for what they have. I am so thankful to have a husband who cares for me, and loves me more then any man every has. He is truly a gift.

Day 174

So just because everyone keeps asking, yes we did go on a cruise, we didn't have the greatest time ....and I will just leave it at that. If you must know you can message me personally. We do have one decent picture.

So there you are.....our trip to the Bahamas.

I have been thinking lately about the word "friend" and what it means to call someone a friend and what it means to be a friend. I have never had a ton of friends.....not real ones anyways. I have around 3 or four that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if I need them to come wipe my butt they would be there.....ok so maybe not that drastic....lol. But one of them did hold my wedding dress up 5 min before I walked down the aisle at my wedding because I had nervous pee syndrome... a true friend.

You know everyone has many groups of friends.....you have your acquaintances....the ones you say hey to in passing because you know each other you wont really take the time to stop and talk to the in the grocery store......you know you do it.....

Then you have the people you work with....who sometimes become really good friends with, and then I am sure there are many other groups.

I have struggled even most recently with considering someone a friend and finding out later.....they really weren't my friend at all. And nothing drives me nuts more then someone acting like they like me to my face when I know darn well they are talking about me behind my back and really don't like me at all.....don't sit there and give me a hug when you don't like me at all. I dont care to spend my time with those who dont value my presence. I mean not to say that I should get a red carpet and balloons and a party every time I show up somewhere.....but at least that the person actually cares that I showed up. I hope that makes sense.

Anyone who has ever gone through this you know how it feels. And it pretty much sucks....and it hurts. It hurts to know that even as an adult that I am still not good enough for some people. I am who I am. I am too old to fight for someone to be my friend.

As much as it sucks I know that it was meant for me to go trough this and I am walking away and thinking of it as a learning experience. I think the biggest thing I have learned is to invest more time in the friends that I love. In fact I had dinner with two of them this week. It was filling for my soul. Please pray for Eric and I as it is not just me going through this but Eric as well.

Also we are going through a transition in our lives right now. We have a big decision to make together....and we are just hoping everything goes smoothly and works out. We ask that even though you don't know what it is to pray for us. You will find out hopefully soon. We are choosing not to tell everyone just yet till we know for sure that it is actually happening. Thanks! Hope everyone has a great, short week at work, and a good holiday. Give thanks to the Lord for all the many blessing in your life. Hopefully we will have a very big blessing soon. =)

Day 155-157 Disney Continued....

So Wednesday we woke up excited and ready to hit the parks. I was thinking with the time of year being that most children were in school, I thought the parks wouldn't be that crowded.....man was I ever wrong. It was crowded....and hot during the day. But even though it was hot and crowded, not to mention I was in al lot of pain, we had fun riding the rides and spending time together.

As much as we want children, I was personally glad that at this point in time that we dont. I recommend any couple who is thinking about going to Disney World to go before they have kids. There were several couples we saw, young and old, who were enjoying the parks on their own. I do not envy any of our friends that have children. It was a blessing that we got to do this alone with out children for the first time as a couple.

I was in awe of the fact that people were bringing babies to this park....and when I mean babies I mean 3 months to 2 years. I just dont get it. Who wants to tote around a stroller, diaper bag, and fight through thousands of people for a child who wont even remember they came. My kids got to be walking and potty training before we would even consider a trip......just my opinion.

So back the point....

Disney World was a blast.....tiring.....but a blast. For some reason my legs were really bothering me the whole time we were there.....I mean it was so bad it gave me a flash back to my freshman year in high school when I was playing basketball and running all the time and how much my legs hurt....I could hardly walk. But I pushed through it and had a good time despite the fact that my legs were on fire and I had no clue why.

This was a time in our lives where we were thankful we didn't have children. We were able to make are own schedule, ride what we wanted, skip what we didn't, eat when and where we wanted and stay as long as we wanted. Part of what this trip did for us was make us realize that we LOVE the fact we are childless. I mean if we would have decided to have kids right now this trip would have been out of the question.

I love the Disney Company. There service was great and all their staff was generally happy to be there. Ironically one of the only people I saw that wasnt smiling was the lady hold one of the parade banners. She was singing along to the song.....but she was not smiling. One part that I was kinda disappointed at was that I remember Disney being an alcohol free park. Well it isnt any longer..... I just think with as many children that are in that park everyday I think they should have skipped on that way of making money. Again my opinion.

I think the only other part that kinda dissapointed me was the lack of characters. Unless you wanted to stand in line for an hour to meet Woody and Buzz, watching a parade or show, or went to one of the character meals ( which you had to pay extra for) you almost never saw the characters. We did get to get a few pictures with some of the characters in Epcot

These were the only character we got to take pictures with =(. But they were by far the most important.

This was the closest we got to seeing Whinnie the Pooh and Tigger...our faves......I mean would you wait ing a long line for that....We didnt

We dining plan, which I would recommend as well. It was simple to use and saved us alot of time and money. It was around $42 a night per a person....$84 a day for both of us. But if you would have saw what it cost us just to eat dinner (up to $80) we knew right away that it was worth it, not only for the convenience but for the priced. Cause lets face it......Disney finds its way to get your money. I liked mostly for its convenience but also because we got so much food. I mean most of the time it was almost too much cause you not only get the entrée but also a desert...which I never have room for. And even better all the food was great. Down the the hot dog we had for lunch.

Over all the trip was great. We cant wait to go back. We both agreed that next time we go not only are we going to go for longer but that we would stay in a nicer hotel. We stayed at the lowest of the low.....but I mean for how long we were in the room I guess it was ok.

He is wearing a Goofy hat if you cant tell.....I should have made him get it.

Hope everyone has a good weekend!!

Day 155-157 Harry Potter/ DISNEY!!

So a few months back we had planned on going on a cruise. I got the BRILLIANT idea to to also plan a trip to Disney World. I had been several times to Orlando and in Cali but I haven't been since I was 13 and Eric has NEVER been.....I know what kid doesn't beg his parents to take him to Disney World???....I know I did. So anyways I planned the whole trip. From where we went and when to where we ate. I was so excited!! Eric was.....excited too I guess.

So Eric and I got packed and were ready to go when Eric came up with another BRILLIANT idea. Anyone who knows me knows that I LOVE Harry Potter. Well Universal Studios just open one of the coolest places I have ever seen.....Its called the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. If you LOVE Harry Potter like I do you should so check this place out.

outhttp://www.universalorlando.com/harrypotter/

Call me cheesy, geeky, crazy, whatever you want......I LOVE it!I started reading these books in the 9th grade and just fell in love. So anyways we left early Tuesday....like 5am which usually doesn't even register on my alarm clock, but I was ready to get out of town!! So we made to Orlando and then I saw this!!

This you might recognize as what they refer to in the movies as Hogsmead/Diagon Ally....It's a little of both.....and it was like walking into the movie. They had everything.....the wand shop, the candy store, the joke shop, the book store, the cloak store where you could literally buy a cloak from your favorite "house"...in the wand shop you could buy Harry's wand....or really anyone else from the movie...we were not that crazy to buy a wand or a cloak......then you walked a little farther and saw this!!

Ok so its not the greatest picture......but in my husbands defense I took this picture and the sun was directly behind it and it was the best I could do....and it was a point and shoot Nikon.....which is the lowest of the low..... It was neat. The castle was actually a ride and as you went through the castle you saw certain things from the movie like Dumbledore's office, the moving pictures and a few other things......and the ride was AWESOME!!! Here are a few others from that trip.

This is Hogwarts Express

This is the all famous Butter Beer.....and tame yourselves....its not really beer

Ollivander's wand shop.....and I guess that is suppose to be Ollivander. We waited 45 min to go into this "wand shop".....there was nothing cheesier then the show they put on in here. Remember in the first movie when Harry goes to get his wand.....yeah they recreated this scene with some one in the crowd....sadly this poor kid couldn't speak english!!!....then they wouldn't even give him the wand!!! They told him it was available for purchase....so wrong

And here is me with my Butter Beer.....and frankly it was disgusting. They said it was suppose to taste like shortbread cookie and butterscotch.....sounded ok....and I wanted to cup.....but I ended up pouring most of it out.

I also forgot to add that the people who worked there spoke in an British accent.....weird.....because they were obviously not British........but most of them, especially the one who worked the ride spoke like that. The first time I heard it I was like.....for real.....did she really just do that.....but then I heard the rest of them talking like that......I thought it was slightly over the top, but I guess they wanted it to be realistic. We had fun though and I was glad that Eric was willing to spend the little extra money to take me. Disney to come tomorrow!!

Day 101

Typically the first hundred days are when a newly elected president gets reviewed on how he is doing or what he has accomplished during his first 100 days in office.

The first 100 days of our marriage have had their ups and downs. No one wants to tell you the bad parts of marriage....the days were you want to be on opposite sides of the house, and play the silent treatment, or the ones were you get so mad you try sleeping on the couch and realize that your bed is much more comfy so you stay far away as you can so you dont touch........I know it happens in every marriage, but no one really talks about it. I am the first to admit that we are by no means perfect and we dont always have the most perfect relationship. I dont think anyone really does.....no matter how perfect they make it out to be. I think every marriage goes threw crap at some point in time. And if anyone tells you they do...they are lying. There is no one in this world that can make me laugh more then Eric can and sometimes thats what gets us through. Once again I did not know Heath very well at all, but I think through his death Eric and I have both realized that life is short, and it can be taken from you in an instant. I think this has helped (at least me) to not get so worked up about the stupid stuff. It just isnt worth it. I would hate myself if the last time I saw him I had called him a name, or been mad at him over something stupid.....I am sure he would too. No one said doing all this at one time was going to be easy.....infact most people said I was crazy and I would regret it because I would have time to appreciate it.....but I dont. With that said work has been insane!!

Since my preceptor has been out sick I have kinda been on my own a little faster then I would have probably liked......ok alot faster then I would have liked. The first day I felt completely lost with out her.....she is kinda like the little birdie in my ear reminding me about what I am missing/ forgetting to do.....and I didn't have my birdie that day......but I made it through, delivered my baby and it wasn't a terrible day after all. This week I did 3.5 c-sections and a delivery....plus I got my first scolding from a doctor....which ended in tears....which ended in a

"wait a minute!!.......there is nothing else I could have done to make that better...so there"!! I honestly dont know why I got so upset....but looking back the tears started when he said "If you were a GOOD nurse you would have..........." but there is really nothing else I could have done to make it better. Days like that day was a day I would like to label a DOS......Day Of Survival. I guess my biggest fear as a nurse is that I am not going to know what to do.....or do the wrong thing......or for get to chart what I did when I did it. My birdie is returning tomorrow....PTL!!! But I guess the whole blessing in this is now that I had that time without her, I know when the time comes for me to officially be on my own it may now be such a stress and fear.....because I have kinda already done it all on my own. One of my instructors works with me and now has students on the floor....I was looking through my charts she came up to me and said " I almost asked you if you needed any help...but then I realized you were doing this for real......" Yeah it was an experience being there with students. Not only because I was one of them last year but I felt like I was almost one of them....just getting paid and with alot more responsibility. There is no doubt that I do love my job. I have wanted to be what I am for as long as I can remember and I am trying my darndest to prove to them that I may only be 22 and fresh out of school, but that I know my stuff, and that I want to be there....and If i dont know my stuff that I ask. I hope that I am changing people minds about me.

One more thing before I go. I have been inspired lately by nothing more then cup cakes. I love to bake and I am seriously thinking about selling gourmet cupcakes. More to come on that though. Thanks for reading....who ever is. I may only have 4 followers but I really hope more people are reading then that.

Day 95- What a week

I cant even begin to describe this week.
A professor of mine lost her son last week in a motorcycle accident. He was 20. Although I didnt know him I know that he was taken to early and I know his family misses him.
I was confronted with a new experience at work that I knew was coming eventually and comes with the job. It was hard to watch but I learned I had to put myself aside and care for the pt. Labor and Delivery is not exactly lollipops and roses....but when it is...thoughs are the times that I know I am doing what I was meant to do.
Yesterday Eric and I were watching the news when we found out about the tragic killing of our friend Heath Jackson. We were speechless. I couldn't believe it. I mean I had just heard him on the radio that morning on the way to target. I am not going to sit here and act like I knew him well, but my husband Eric has know him since we was a kid. I first met him in High School. Heath was suppose to lead worship at Christ Community yesterday night. I was shocked that they decided to go on the worship and have a friend fill in. It was honestly one of the most moving experiences I have ever experienced. To watch the band that was suppose to perform with Heath that night get up there and perform their hearts out not only for Heath but for their God was amazing. I know Heath was there. After we left we heard one of Heath's commercials on the radio. As much as I wanted to turn it off, we listened to it and Eric said something that kinda put things into perspective. Maybe he had performed his purpose in life. Maybe his purpose was to bring the city together for worship and mainstreem christen music in our city. All of this really just made me realize that I dont have to be old or sick to die. I could walk outside my apartment, or drive down the road and my life could be taken from me instantly. I could quite literally be gone tomorrow, as well as anyone else. I am not ready to die. Although my life has not always been the greatest I am blessed to have 22 years, two parents, a sister, and a husband. I know one day I will see Heath again...but will you? Do not wait till you are ready to live for the lord before you decide to make that decision because death doesn't wait for you to make a decision. Make it today. Prayers go out to the Parmer and Jackson family. Also to the killer of Heath Jackson. I hope we can show him the love of Jesus.