To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven Ecclesiastes 3:!

Can I just say.... I hate change....Ok its not necessarily that I hate it. I guess afraid it a better word. Afraid of losing what I have, even if its not working. Afraid of the unknown...is it going to be an easy tradition, one I find better and not as bad as I thought, or is it going to be challenging and difficult for me to find my place and to catch on.  And the weird thing about it is that you can know its coming and still be surprised when it happens no matter how long you knew about it. It always seems to sneak up on you. Before you know it its here and you can no longer escape it and you have no choice but to confront it.....Either way.... it all SUCKS!! (my mother hates that word) The reality in life is....change is inevitable....its going to happen.
I remember right before I got married I was so ready to move and start the next phase in my life, live on my own finally be completely independent (what the heck was I thinking??!!) As the months turned into weeks and the weeks turned into days I still had not packed my room to move.... I couldn't do it. I realized I would never have my own room again, never have my own space, my own bed, my own closet....it was weird.... and I resisted...by not packing. Like that was going to stop it from happening. My best friend ha to come and MAKE me pack. Actually I think she ended up doing most of it!!! lol!!
Change is about to happen in my life again. I have resisted it for about a year, denying it was happening or coming.....but it has. I can no longer resist. I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried or afraid of whats to come or how this will change my everyday life. I just don't know. What I do know is that resisting the change is only going to make me more stressed and afraid. I know the Lord is in control and he will put me in the position that I am supposed to be in to do the most good for his kingdom. I am a servant for him and by trade so where ever I can serve him most, is where I will be.
If you are resisting change in your life, give it to the Lord. He tells us not to worry but to trust in him. Believe me, I know thats easier said then done.
When I was ending nursing school I was literally getting to the point where I thought I was losing my mind. I was getting married 3 weeks after graduation, I had finals, exit exams and boards to study for and pass. If I did not pass the exit exam it meant Eric and I could not go on our honeymoon that was already paid for....it was serious. And I seriously thought I was about to LOSE IT!!! I got to a point where I just had to stop. I had to put down the books, know that everything that was learned had been learned and there was nothing else I could do but pray. And pray I did. I also asked others to pray for me, which I hardly ever do. Every time I thought about it I prayed. Guess what??? He did it, because Lord knows I couldn't do alone! I was mentally done! But I passed....not with flying colors....but I passed!! So today thats what I do. When I start to panic on the inside I say a little pray to myself to calm down and know who in control of this mess of a world I live in. He has the perfect plan for all of our lives. I hope I can continue to remember this.

2006 wasn't that long ago!

All of these graduations lately have me thinking of my own..... a whole 7 years ago! I was so excited to finally be done with school, and move on with what I was planning to do.....NURSING! I was tired of the structure, and the dang bell dictating my days. I was tired of trying to find a parking spot every morning and trying my best to not get sideswiped by a bus, or a car (which actually did happen eventually). Tired of making sure I had clothes for band and dinner theater everyday. I was even tired of some of the people. Luckily I wasnt one of those girls that was in a ton of drama....but I had my fair share. I was just done.....and tired!
What I didn't realize was the hardest part was yet to come. I wasn't one of those kids that made all A's...I made pretty much As and Bs (with a few Cs due to one particular, god awful, ridiculous teacher who shall not be named....but was later fired). But.....I didn't study a whole lot. You should have seen what happened when I did that in college!!! Lets just say it didn't work! I worked my but off in Human Anatomy....I studied ALL THE TIME!! I didn't go anywhere without flash cards and books! It was ridiculous!!! I was in the lab with my dead cat many nights when my friends were else where. It did not come easy for me.
All that stuff that I was so ready to get rid of in high school I would have done all over again, and again, and again!! As you can tell my 4 years in college were not very fun. I was so ready to be an adult and more independent and away from all the structure...but after I got away from it I craved it! In most college classes you are simply a number....you very rarely are known by your name, or have relationship with your professors (except in nursing school...different world....they were great!) They could care less if your late, if you did your work, if you wore your pajamas or a ball gown....no one cared. Some teachers would let you in late, some would shut the door in your face and not think twice (true story....saw it happen....not to me of course) It's just a different world you get thrusted into with out really any warning.
Even now as a married, 25 year old, with a career, and a mortgage and hopefully a growing family soon I still dont feel like an adult.  And the crazy thing is all those years I was wanting to grow up I didn't realize I had the entire rest of my life to be adult like!!
So, for my two favorite graduates Savannah and Justin (and let me just say I used to consider these two the "little" kids I would hang out with...not so little anymore. They are pretty much my equals now) live your life for the now! You are never going to be 18 again and you have a lot of adult years ahead. Decisions and problems are now going to be for you to take care of a figure out on your own with out the help of your parents to guide you or to do it for you.... and it stinks.  Eric and I are so proud of y'all! We know you both are going to do great things!!
Also, today is my sister's 22 birthday!!Happy Birthday Melissa! Hope you have a great day!!