Haven't updated in a while...I know....Who reads this thing anyways!! This whole baby thing has been an adventure. I thought doing what I do I would be more prepared then the average pregnant women. I forgot that my job mostly deals with the laboring women....not the everyday pregnant one.
Eric and I got pregnant VERY fast. It was almost so shocking that I didn't believe it at first (I took 5 test before I could come to terms with it).
I was very lucky. I mean VERY lucky and blessed with almost no nausea.... but I was HUNGRY!! I mean the kind of hungry that I can't even begin to describe. The best description I can think of is the they describe the thirst new vampires have for blood in Twilight.... I would kill for food. I was so hungry I would snatch food from a small child. A small, hungry, child. I was so hungry. I cried, and worried and thirsted over food. Ask my friends.... and my husband.
My Second trimester brought on a whole other set of symptoms. The beginning of October the L&D unit at Doctors closed for good. I started working at Midtown Medical in L&D. This was a change. It was like starting a new job all over again....with out really starting a new job. As a labor nurse I knew the dangers of what could happen during pregnancy. The only thing is we were mostly shielded from that at Doctors. We dealt mostly with healthy, normal pregnancies. We had our share of sick ones and occasional fetal demises, but this was different. A sick pregnant women was not out of the norm any more, it was an every day thing. I think in the first month I worked there every time I came in there was something going on....and they all had around the same due date as me. Most people don't realize how much can go wrong. Not to scare anyone or sound vain...but I lost the connection with my baby. I just could't attach. It was suddenly too early. Too much could happen. No one seemed to understand. I was no longer happy and excited. I was scared. Scared that the same thing that was happening to them, would happen to me... to us. I didn't want to hear about the baby, see baby stuff, and I especially didn't want it in my house. It was too much. People would ask me how I was and come up to me smiling and excited and I just wanted to scream!!!! I had no medical reason to worry. Everything was fine, nothing abnormal with me or the baby. But I knew too much. This is the part of pregnancy that everyone failed to tell me about. I was starting to worry that I would never be that "happy pregnant women". You know, the one thats always smiling and glowing and acting all googly because they are pregnant and seem oblivious. I wish I could have been oblivious. Whats that saying?? "ignorance is bliss". Oh so true. I don't know if it was changing jobs, a higher acuity of patients, getting to know new people, in new surroundings, with new ways of doing things, on top of being separated from all my work friends I was used to, the holidays, on top of being pregnant. I'm not sure. Probably a little of it all. But for some reason after the new year it was like I could breath again. I had reached the 25 week mark and viable....too early.... but viable. And a light at the end of the tunnel.
This, the third trimester, has been pretty good. I've started this weird sleeping pattern lately. It started out around 20 weeks I would wake up around 2 am every night.... and could never go back to sleep till around 5. Then it moved to 4.....then 5... and now I'm back to sleeping the whole night! Weird. I'm sure it will change again. But other then accommodating my growing stomach, which came out of now where I might add, I feel great. Probably the best I have felt physically and emotionally since August. With only having around 7 weeks left I know it will be here before we know it. The nursery is almost done, with the exception of the last minute decision to redo the closet and getting the bedding.... thats a whole other story. With 2 more showers left as well I'm hoping we will have no problems getting the rest of the stuff we need for Baby Crouch! I can honestly say I am now that happy, excited pregnant women. We are ready! Ready to know and see our sweet baby. They say it has hair!! We'll see. 7 weeks.....48 days.....20 night shifts left. But who's counting??
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